Teacher or lion tamer? You be the judge...but I got a glimpse!

As a child I used to visit the Circus and always loved the attractions there. I adored the people on the trapeze and wished I had that kind of courage. They made flying through the air seem so easy, as if they had almost no training at all. But there was another guy that fascinated me. It was the guy with the lion show. They would pause the activities to erect the cage and then the lion tamer would come in first and one by one he would let the lions in and place them on some kind of stools. From there he would ask them to do some tricks. Now, lions are not at all common in Europe and so they seemed rather dangerous to me. It was quite clear, even to me as a child, that the lion tamer (or “Dompteur” as we called it in French) spent most of his time controlling the lions and making sure that they would stay on their assigned stools. Every so often he would ask one lion to jump through a hoop or do some other kind of trick. But his eyes were always everywhere and if another lion got out of line he would swing his whip and send him back onto his chair. This was essential, you know, if you didn’t want to get eaten up by a lion. One couldn’t help to have a little bit of morbid curiosity and wonder what would happen if they all jumped off at once. But, luckily, it never came to that and everybody, including me, was hugely impressed with the calm and fearless manner in which he handled the scary animals.

Now, what’s this got to do with teachers?? Last week, just for a day, I had the wonderful opportunity to fill in for a missing teacher at my daughter’s Primary School. My task was to supervise the class and to try and complete certain tasks with them. Their regular teacher had laid out the routine and all I had to do was follow the program. While I am proud to say that it went well and we accomplished all the given tasks, I must say, I have since gained a new understanding for teachers.

Teaching, so it seems to me, has much in common with lion taming. My daughter (or your son) might be an angel at home, but put them into a room with 24 others and you have a dangerous scenario. One by one they come in after break and just to get them onto their chairs is a challenge! When we tried to finish a math worksheet together, it seemed very much like making them jump through a hoop. Some kids just won’t keep on working without constant encouragement and coaching. Others are rather overly eager and need to be slowed down a bit. All in all, it seems to take an enormous amount of time to explain a task in a classroom full of children and get them all started at the same time.

Modern society might frown upon the use of discipline and they are beautiful children, each one of them, but they certainly act like a bunch of little lions and a young student teacher might even consider them a little dangerous. So, like the lion tamer, a teacher has to be brave and vigilant, as they tend to be unruly at a moments notice. As a matter of fact, I must have spent the majority of my time, keeping them quiet and on their stools. I know this is the nature of things; after all, I am a seasoned mom. Take one of these children and he or she might be an angel. Take a group or 25 of them in one room, well, then you better have some training in lion taming!

So moms, if you didn’t appreciate your child’s teacher so far, take my word for it – he or she is probably doing a marvelous job! Just for controlling a room full of kids in such a calm and fearless manner, you ought to be impressed with them!

(Images courtesy of: www.morguefile.com)

What ride are you on?

“Time” is such an issue in our lives that it becomes more and more apparent that our choices we make are so incredibly important. My day can be flying by somewhat in a blur, be wonderfully peaceful or anything in-between. The deciding factor for what day I have, seems to be the choices I make.

The way I see it, my day, perhaps even my life, is just like a fun fair, but the question is…what ride am I on? On a fun fair (or fairground you might call it) there are many different kind of rides. There are bumper cars where you can have quick encounters with other people who keep on bumping into you. A “bumper car day” is a day with lots of quick meetings, some fun but perhaps also some nasty encounters and the general feeling is - there is too little time.

Perhaps you would prefer to be on a carousel, going around in peaceful circles. Your view will be slightly blurred and it’s a small world, but carousel days at least seem manageable.

Other days might feel like you are going round and round at a rapid speed but getting absolutely nowhere. That would be the day that you have chosen to ride the “caterpillar” or, if it’s extremely hectic and feels out of control, you might have stepped onto a roller coaster. Such days are very chaotic with a lot of noise and many distractions and they pass at an incredible speed.

And for those of us who are slightly depressed, PMS or whatever the cause might be, it might feel like they’ve embarked on a “Ghost Train”. That would be one of those days where you feel stuck in a tunnel with old regrets and past failures and other scary thoughts and if that’s where you are today I say…DISEMBARK!

Come and join me on the Ferries wheel! That is my favorite ride of them all. I get to go on the Ferries wheel when I have my quiet time with God. It’s a time where He takes me high above and shows me a beautiful view of the scenery. There, from this eagle perspective, my day makes sense and I can figure out how to get through this fairground called life.

Image courtesy of morguefile.com

I have discovered that quiet times are now my favorite part of the day. When last have you been on the Ferries wheel? Has your day been somewhat of a roller coaster ride? Do you want to stay on there or is it time to change the ride? It’s just a thought and it is your choice. What will you ride tomorrow? You decide. You will find me, early morning, on the Ferris wheel and from up there I am wishing you a HAPPY DAY!

Any blog should have a MISSION STATEMENT...here is mine!

Oh, wow! I think I just found the most beautiful illustration for the "purpose" of my blog! Normally one creates a "mission statement" at the beginning of an undertaking, so in a way, this should have been at the beginning of my blog. But in the spirit of "better late than never", here is my mission statement now.

I am currently reading a marvelous book called "Seven Days In Utopia - Golf's sacred journey" written by David L. Cook, PhD. Allow me to quote something he wrote on page 40 and if it doesn't make much sense to you (probably because you don't play golf) just bear with me for a little while.

"There is no model swing in this business, no pat answers. Each person must develop a blueprint for his swing and style of play. He must have such a conviction for the manner in which it is done that there are no chinks in the armor when facing the toughest foe on tour. The toughest challenge you will face is not necessarily the golf course, or even your competitor's scores. Your toughest foe will be the casual comment offered up by a fellow player or teacher about how you should be doing it. When I ask you about any part of your game, I want a solid answer, and I want to hear conviction in your voice. If you don't have a solid answer, I'll send you to the oak to write about it. I deeply believe that in writing our thoughts unseen wisdom rises to the occasion. I am not here to improve your swing; my purpose is to help you find your game. That is exactly what I intend to do."

That's it! That's exactly it! To all my fellow moms out there, here is my mission statement for my blog, just in case you wondered why I write:

There is no specific model in motherhood, no pat answers either. Each mom must develop a blueprint for her own family and her own style of mothering them. She must have such a conviction for the manner in which it is done that there are no cracks in her armor when facing the toughest foe on her journey. The toughest challenge we will face is not necessarily life itself, or even the way other mother's score. Our toughest foe will be the casual comment offered up by a fellow mother or teacher about how you should be doing it. I cannot ask you about any part of your game (such is the nature of a blog), but I encourage you to find a solid stance and conviction that you ARE A GOOD MOM in your own way. If you don't have such a stance or conviction, I recommend you take more quiet time and write about it until you do. I deeply believe that in writing our thoughts, unseen wisdom rises to the occasion. I see that on a daily basis in my own life. So, mom, I am not here to try and improve your mothering skills, I wouldn't be qualified to even try. My purpose is to help you find your game, your mothering style, hoping that this will improve the way that you cope with whatever is coming your way today. That is exactly what I intend to do!

So here it is. That's my mission statement. Isn't that exactly what we need? Less "well meant comments" and more help finding our own way? This is not to say that we can't learn from each other. But your style is your style and and well meant comments only too often end up leaving you feeling guilty and drained. I am still trying to find my own game, but in the process, I would be honored to help you find yours!

HAPPY MOTHERING MOM, HANG IN THERE TODAY!

 
(Thank you to David L. Cook's work which I have used or paraphrased for this post.)

(P.s. If you want to leave a comment below, but don't have a Google account...just type it into the box below and then from the drop boxes choose "anonymous" and publish it. Easy as pie!)

Trying to be a good mom is like "trying to fall pregnant"...

For some of us it seems easy, for others almost impossible. I am currently the mom of a teenager and I often ask myself - what is a good parent? One who provides abundantly? Or one who loves abundantly? Or might it possibly be both? I do provide the best I can, I suppose my husband is doing most of the providing since he is the income earner in the family. But I provide my time and my love as best as I can. But trying to show my love to my teenager sometimes seems equally difficult as trying to fall pregnant at the wrong time of the month! Joyce Meyer, my favorite bible teacher and bestselling author, has recently preached about the "lovewalk" of Christians and I have been pondering over mine ever since. I am still pondering, so today you get the ramblings of my busy mind.

Joyce Meyer was talking about her past and much like her, in my past, every word of praise and commendation I received, has gone toward filling that empty place inside of me. I measured myself by what others thought of me and I spent far too much time in my life trying to gain approval from other people. People who themselves had more than enough problems that they were running from also. Back then, I never quite understood where true love and approval come from, I never realized that I had a heavenly Father I could take refuge in, a father who unlike mine would never reject me. I was rejected by my earthly father and then emotionally neglected by my mother. Outward behavior of a fairly obsessive nature such as my cleaning addiction and perfectionism were the result of it and have merely anesthetized the pain a bit. They have given me little comfort and no quality of life at all. As a matter of fact it steals my breath, thinking of all I have given away, all the time I have wasted and how I have devalued the people in my life by the way I treated them. But today I know that love is...forgiving your husband when you really think he is in the wrong. Love is...doing Grade 3 homework with your child when you would rather be doing something else. Love is...trying really hard to bite your tongue when your anger levels are sky high and you really want to shout at your children. Love is...to be nothing really special for years, when you know something special is hidden inside of you.

Love is...so many other things. But where do we find this kind of love when we are so frantically busy we don’t seem to ever be able to “fill up”? The same way we were trying to fall pregnant in the first place...PRAY and RELAX mom! Do not stress. Relax and make God your intimate close friend. So that out of your friendship with him you will change. Whatever you do…don’t try to change yourself. It won't work, unless He walks by your side. Keep your faith daily, that God is working on your problems and don’t let bitterness and offense lead to strife. The bottom line is, you couldn't fall pregnant without God's help and you can't be a good mom without Him either.

Practice your lovewalk is what Joyce Meyer said. But for me, I had to change that a little. You see, the word "lovewalk" almost seemed like a standard to me. And every time I shouted at my children I felt like I had failed. It became an impossible standard to live up to and almost every day I kept failing and piling up feelings of guilt. But then...in a quiet time...I felt God gently nudging me and saying it's not a "lovewalk" it's "love...and...walk"! So, you see? It's not a standard mom! Not something you have to perform! All you have to do is, you love and you walk. You love your children one moment today and one moment tomorrow and in-between you keep on walking. Get it? I did finally get it! All I have to do today to be a good mom is to keep loving them, when I can and as best as I can and keep walking with God and let Him be my friend. That is my love walk. I am going to practice mine today. Wishing you HAPPY loving and walking today mom!!!

Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici 
 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Motherhood...a game of "Snakes & Ladders" ?

Mom, have you ever quarreled with your teenage son? So much that, after dropping him at school, it left you with the feeling that he might enjoy school better than his time at home? This would have, if you are anything like me, left you with feelings of guilt and shame. I have had an opportunity to ponder over this today and I have decided that these are the lies and the schemes of the evil one (the devil or whatever you want to call him). I believe that sometimes he wants to defeat us right from the start, from the early morning, so that our light won't shine that day. But the truth is...

Growth doesn’t happen automatically. Neither my son’s or mine. Relationships are and will always be hard work and growth happens when we overcome our problems, much like we would climb a pyramid. Just imagine a pyramid with a path going up at a steady angle on the outside of it and as you go around and climb higher, you keep overlooking the same sort of scenery. Many lessons we learn in life or battles we fight are kind of recurring just like that. For example, how to deal with my teenage son or how to let go of my past and forgive. Those are problems that I keep facing as I keep climbing. We steadily make our way up, going round and round throughout the years and on the way up we seem to face our problems again and again. But, you see, each time we face them, we face them from a slightly higher point of view. Until...one day...we get to the top and finally enjoy the view!

That's how I feel when I keep facing my issues. Issues of motherhood or issues of pride. Moments where I need to humble myself and don't want to. Any issue I face, I keep facing repeatedly until I conquer it from the top of the mountain. Perhaps a slightly better way to explain my feelings, would be to compare it to a game of "Snakes & Ladders". We keep moving up, but occasionally we get a setback and some days even feel like we've had to take that great big slide down and start almost at the bottom again. But would you ever give up in a game of "Snakes & Ladders"? Certainly not! You keep climbing and even if you are the last one to arrive...you will finish and so it is with us!

That’s the truth I want you to know Mom. That you will make it to the top. If you keep climbing. Don’t give up. Hang in there. One day at a the time. Slowly make your way up the pyramid and know that there are plenty of us climbing with you. We all get bad days and we all need encouragement and if you are one of those moms who have made it to the top...all relaxed and composed and enjoying the view...please remember those of us who are still climbing and if you get a chance, please encourage us today! Wishing you all a victorious day! ;-)

Photo is my own

EASTER...is Jesus' OPEN DAY

Last year, about this time, I had the privilege to attend the Pearson High School Open Day - a time of introduction to all new parents and students. Coming from Europe and an entirely different educational system, this was all so new to me. But even some of my South African friends said that, coming from Primary School, it seemed like a whole new world. A world we didn’t even know it existed. So much more to do; so much more to aspire to and so many new people to meet. Quite overwhelming at first, but exciting nonetheless. On that evening, the admission rules were explained to us. This new school, this new world is reserved for some. Yes, anyone can apply, but only 160 students will be admitted. That’s the reality, these are the limits set by the headmaster or the authority in charge. However, somewhere among the application forms, there was a piece of paper that stated a very important part of the admission rules - that admission is guaranteed if you live in the vicinity of the school. It said that if Pearson High is your nearest High School and if you are a rightful resident of Summerstrand, then you will not be refused entry. What a relief to know! Especially in the presence of the other 500 people who might all be applying later. Why am I telling you all this…?

Easter is coming up and I have been pondering over this thought for a while. I believe EASTER IS JESUS’ OPEN DAY! He came; He made His presentation. Heaven is His world, a world we don’t know, but it exists, far beyond any imagination. God wants all of us to be there one day. Anyone can apply. Not everyone will be granted entry. But I have some really GOOD NEWS! There is a  little detail lots of people keep overlooking and that is: if Jesus is your friend and if you “live in the vicinity” of the cross he died on, admission for you is also GUARANTEED! Yes, you may fail a grade or two, you might even mess up on your very next exam, but if you live with Jesus in your heart, your grades don’t matter. You will get in.

This vicinity thing is really important because it is easy to be worried. Many people worry about whether they will go to heaven one day or not. Just like many parents have asked me since that Open Day: “What if you don’t get in?” and “Will you apply to any other High School?” and my answer has always been NO. None. This is the only one we will apply for. No doubt it is the best one for us and the good news is we live nearby. Some parents seem to worry, even though they live near the school too. Perhaps they did not read the small print and now the devil can sneak in a thought of worry or two: “Are you sure your child will be accepted?” or “What if his grades don’t measure up?”.

I, myself, have had lots of thoughts that I am not good enough for heaven and there were many times where I have sinned and the devil tried to convince me that I would not make “the cut”. But that is when I now go and read the small print of God’s promise again, for in the bible it says, that if you are a friend of Jesus and you make him your Lord, you WILL get into heaven. Your behavior is not the deciding factor, but your closeness to Jesus is. So the only question for you, over this Easter, is this: is He your friend and do you live near the cross? If not, why not make him your friend this Easter and make sure your admission is guaranteed? Jesus was here. He had His “Open Day” when He hung on the cross and He is reminding us every Easter. He has enough space for all of us. But there is a deadline for enrolling and you need to enroll now before he comes back.

I think even the devil knows that his time is almost up. Almost every new action movie released is dealing with some kind of “impending return”. People are sensing it and the devil is trying to advertise his own team. He will do anything to keep you distracted and busy and away from Jesus. But Easter is Jesus’ Open Day! Have you applied yet? If not…why don’t you pray to Him today!

Image courtesy of www.morguefile.com

How do you go to bed mom?

I have been paging through an old diary of mine and found an entry, that is as relevant today as it was back then. But more importantly, I think it is relevant to every stressed out mom and I am hoping I can make you smile with this today. Prompted by a Joyce Meyer teaching at the time, I took note of all the things I did before going to bed. Here is my journal entry:

"Yesterday, at 20h30, I was tired, so I told my hubby 'I think I am going to bed.' After that I got up and washed the dishes and tidied the kitchen. Once done in the kitchen, I quickly tried to fill in the High School application forms for my son, which ended up taking over an hour to complete. I then moved around the house to switch off the lights in the garage and everywhere else, locked the office and popped upstairs to check on my children. They seemed alright, but the toilet roll in their bathroom was empty, so back downstairs and up again for a refill. Going back down to the kitchen, I answered various sms mostly pertaining to my kids play-dates for tomorrow. I made myself a cup of tea and finally went to lie in bed where I noticed that it was now 22h30. By now I was exhausted, but knowing that I would have to go buy my groceries tomorrow, I  wrote my shopping list while sipping on my tea in bed. Then I turned off the light and tried to go to sleep.

And my hubby?

He was still lying on the couch watching TV and when he decided to go to bed...he switched off the TV and did just that. He just went to bed. Why ARE we so different??"

That was back then! Today...I know that God made us different and He provides me with little moments of peace, if I need them and I ask Him to. I do not stress over this difference anymore. I hope you don't stress either, but had a good laugh...! HAVE A HAPPY DAY TODAY!

"OUT FOR THE MOMENT" - BACK SOON!

Blogging on a regular basis can be difficult, especially if you are a mom with children. According to the average blogging standard I have been quiet for too long. Have I given up blogging? No! But you see...I am busy blooming and no one can explain this better than Moriah Peters! So if you have 3 minutes to spare, listen to this beautiful song...

BLOOM (by Moriah Peters)

...and know that if you are having a tough season at the moment and feel somewhat lonely amongst those weeds and thorns...just keep believing and KNOW that you are definitely made to BLOOM too!

I will be back! I haven't stopped trying to encourage you. I am just busy re-setting my GPS. Not the one in my car, but my godly-positioning-system. We all need to do that every now and then, don't we? So for now...please have a happy week and come visit again!

Image courtesy of www.morguefile.com

Hubby playing golf ?

God is a Gentlemen. Undoubtedly.

Golf is a gentleman's game. So they say.

Today is Saturday and I think that God must love golf. Why? Because golf can teach us a number of good lessons about life. 

Here are some of my thoughts about golf...

1. Golf is a game that cannot be rushed! So is life or at least the way it is meant to be lived. We ought to be walking the fairways of life and take a deep breath before the next shot!
2. Golf is usually played with a partner, but often in a group of four and once you start a game together, you cannot bail out until the end. I bet that is what God had in mind for marriage and families, whatever their size. No matter how many times you end up in the "rough" or how many bogey's you play in the game, you stick with your team right to the end!
3. Most players, of course, play with a so-called "handicap". Kind of a numerical measure of a golfer's potential based on his past, allowing players of different proficiency to play against each other on somewhat equal terms. I have often wondered, based on my past, what my handicap would have to be in order to be somewhat equal with other moms. I know we ought not to compare and we are all "equal in His eyes"! But when I have a "bad mommy day" I sure wish I could raise my handicap a little. The higher the handicap of a player, the poorer the player actually is and I must admit that at least in the early years of motherhood, I must have had some pretty high handicaps. Ain't I glad we serve a forgiving God! And it is also refreshing to know that given enough practice your handicap usually does come down.
4. A good golf player learns to interpret the "variables" such as wind, terrain and other outside influences. Anything that could bring your ball off course and into the bunker. We have moods and we have needs and somehow they often seem to collide and when they do, we seem to end up in each others "bunker". So perhaps, in order to have a less stressful life, we have to stand still every now and then and learn to interpret the many variables in our day rather than just rushing down the fairway all day? 
5. But my absolute favorite rule in golf is a thing called "mulligan" which is given to a player by the other players. A mulligan is given when a player strikes a really bad shot and he's allowed to re-play the shot from where he was before, without any penalty whatsoever. The score is taken as if the first errant shot had never been made. This practice is used to speed up the game, by reducing the time spent searching for a lost ball. This in turn reduces frustration for all of the players and increases enjoyment of the game. What a perfect way to explain forgiveness in life! We all make mistakes, yet often we refuse to forgive and end up searching the "rough" for our ball. Frustrating ourselves and those around us. How much easier would it be if we just let it go? Take a mulligan...or give one! Quick, friendly and with no penalties involved. When last have you given your husband a "mulligan" or asked him for one if you made a mistake? Need I say more?

These are just some of my thoughts about golf. I think it's a good game for anyone to play. Sadly some guys have given golf a bad name, by going on drinking sprees after the game. But mine is not like that and as far as I can see...if your hubby has gone off to play golf today then cheer up! After all he's learning the basics of life. Golf is a gentleman's game. If it's played right. Let's give each other more mulligans today!

Image courtesy of www.morguefile.com

From the chronicles of motherhood...

Oh what a beautiful end to a movie! Have you seen The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader mom? If not, a must see for everyone young at heart! To tell you the plot of the movie would take too long, but I want to share some of the end with you. I know, normally you don’t want people to tell you the end of a movie. But please make an exception for me today. There is a moment in that end, that is too beautiful not to be shared with moms.

Almost at the end of the movie, a group of children consisting of Eustace, Lucy, Edmund and Caspian and a mouse by the name of Reepicheep arrive at a mysterious shore before a massive wave. Aslan appears and tells them that his country lies beyond, but if they go there they may never return. (Jesus…heaven…you get it.) They are all given the choice to cross the wave, but the children opt to go home for now. Prince Caspian, having had his father tragically taken from him at an early age, considers the offer for a moment. He stands there with one hand in the wave representing the curtain between the two lands, pondering if he would find his father there. Clearly this would be a more beautiful land. After a brief moment of hesitation he turns around and says: "I can't imagine my father would be very proud that I gave up what he died for. I spent too long wanting what was taken from me and not what was given. I was given a kingdom. People." And then he vows: "I promise to be a better king." Aslan responds with "You already are." He was King of Narnia now and he knew, he needed to stay and look after his people.

Hmmm. Sounds soooo familiar! I realize that I had one foot across in “Aslan’s land” during my cancer journey 3 years ago and I often pondered if I would find my family there. Especially my much loved grandfather. Clearly heaven would have been a better place. But I opted to fight and with God’s help, I stayed. The time to cross had not yet come. There is work to be done and for me too it is time to vow: I spent too long wanting what was taken from me and not what was given. I was given a kingdom. Two beautiful children. I promise to be a better mom. In my heart I hope that I already am. God has given me two beautiful children who are growing up to be warriors soon and He has asked me to look after them for now.

As a mom, there are many more scenes and people in that movie I can relate to. For example Eustace, a true complainer and grumbler at first, having succumbed to the temptation of greed and self-indulgence, was transformed into a dragon for a period of time. When Aslan brought him back to his rightful shape as a boy he admitted that he had fallen short in his relationship with his cousins. He felt that he might have been a better dragon than a boy. Much like him, I fear that I too have fallen short as a mom and at times have been somewhat of a dragon. If God hadn’t come towards me, I might have never made the transformation back from dragon to mom. But most of all I feel with Prince Caspian. 

Perhaps it is not a cancer journey you survived, perhaps it is something else. But I am sure we can all say that we need to vow, as Prince Caspian did, to look after what we've been given and try to be better moms. I trust you will have a good day in your Kingdom today! And if you are stressed out and there seems to be no "Aslan" in your life, allow me to tell you...He's there and He loves you!

Image courtesy of www.morguefile.com

Day 1 @ High School from a mom's point of view...

I never thought it was going be easy. It was bound to happen. Inevitable, one could say. But I didn’t think it would be this hard and I didn’t think it would be this soon. 

When I signed my son up at primary school, I knew the day would come when he would leave and move on. "Before you know it he'll be going to high school," some moms would say. "The years in primary school will seem to fly by," others added, and always ended the sentence with, "So enjoy it while he is here." I did enjoy his years in primary school and I can't say I didn't see the end of it coming.

What I did not see coming was how I would suddenly seem to be disconnected from him and the secret feelings of terror this would cause in my heart. You don’t understand? Perhaps this will help. 

(Photo is my own)

The day before he started high school I watched an American spy film called Body of Lies - a political thriller starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Russel Crowe. Set in the Middle East, it follows the attempts of a CIA agent to catch a terrorist, yet the agent is not alone. He is assisted by technological, counter-intelligence methods such as surveillance drones. From the comfort of the control center the CIA “head-honcho” watches the action, occasionally using satellite technology to transmit orders to the agent in the field. 

Secure in what they see and know, they watch his every move and assist. But at some point during the operation something goes wrong. Satellite transmission breaks up and they lose control. The screen goes blank and they cannot see or hear what is happening on the ground. Anxious moments follow until transmission resumes and they can carry on doing what they do best. Remote assistance at its finest. That is what I felt like today! 

Amid our "daily operations” of life, I seemed to lose control. My son, suddenly on unknown territory, was alone out there and I was unable to assist. Not even cellphones were allowed. This was terrain where I had not set up surveillance yet and moments of intense discomfort followed.

What do I do? I remember what other moms said: ”Relax! You will soon get the hang of it here.” So, at the moment my screen is still “flickering” but I now know transmission will resume shortly. One day he won't need my surveillance and it will be time to “zoom out” on the target. But until then I am sure glad to be his mom!

And if your son or daughter starts high school this week...I wish you a great year!

My New Year's Resolution...

I know it’s a little late and I actually don’t do New Year's Resolutions but I had to give this post a title and this one fitted best. So, here it is: 

I WANT TO BE THE BIGGEST LOSER this year!

That might sound strange to you at first. "Who wants to be a loser?", you might ask. But do you remember the popular TV show "The Biggest Loser"? Where overweight people compete to lose some unnecessary pounds or kilos? It is exactly that show that inspired me to make this resolution, except that I am not over-weight. But I am a mom with a somewhat turbulent childhood and for the past two decades I have been chasing after the losses I incurred. Almost like an addicted gambler who keeps trying to recoup what he has lost at the slot machine. The truth is, these losses affect those around us and in my case they have produced bad habits. 

So this year I want to be the biggest loser of bad habits, bad attitudes and bad thoughts. No more unrealistically high expectations...because all moms shout at their kids now and then. No more underestimating myself...because I can learn self-control when things around me seem to spin out of control. No more jealousy or self-pity...for I have enough reason to know by now that God will give me all that I need. No more negative self-talk…and many more…these are the things I want to lose. What about you? Will you join me? 

(Please scroll down for other encouraging posts!)

Falling Skies in Switzerland

It's been a while since my last post. My apologies. It's not that I don't have anything that would encourage you, but I am travelling again and time to write is awfully scarce when you travel with a family of four. Today, though, I cannot help but write. I love it when God speaks through anything and everything in my day. Even through a Sci-fi TV programme!

You might have seen it. Maybe not. "Falling Skies" is an American TV Drama Series that depicts the battle between humans and their alien invadors. It opens in the chaotic aftermath of an alien attack that has left most of the world completely incapacitated. Some survivors have banded together outside major cities to begin the difficult task of fighting back. Each day is a test of survival as citizen soldiers, in other words normal people like you and me, work to protect the people in their care while also attempting to fight back against the occupying alien force.

At the center of the series is a father called Tom (but it could be a mother!) and his commander Captain Weaver. Tom's family has been torn apart by the invading alien force and he must put his extensive knowledge of military history to the test as one of the leaders of a resistance movement known as the 2nd Mass. He is placed as Weaver's second in command, tasked with ensuring the safety and security of the group's civilian population (see...just like a mother!). Tom will do anything for his sons, including Ben, who was recently rescued from alien control, but is still extremely vulnerable (sounds like my teenage son).

Falling Skies focuses on the resilience of the survivors and their determination to maintain their humanity when all else has been destroyed. It is a tale of endurance, commitment and courage in which everyday people are called upon to become heroes. They may be outmatched, outnumbered and outgunned, but nothing can beat their spirit. Most of all, the series is about the ties that bind people together in the most difficult of circumstances. After the aliens invaded, some of the survivors banded together. They formed a resistance movement, determined to fight back and overthrow the alien invasion. The 2nd Mass is such a resistance regiment and the people, under the command of Captain Weaver and Tom, move around the country in search for other survivors. Throughout their trials and tribulations, the 2nd mass make great advancements in the fight against the aliens. But the battle is just getting started.

In the second season of the show Charleston becomes their new hope. They get word that in Charleston they can find a large group of well organized survivors and plenty of food and water. In other words a place of abundance. But it takes time to get there. They decide to make way for it in order to meet up with them and unite their forces. On their journey there, the fractured group is still dealing with its losses in the past, occasionally lashing out at each other. Complicated relationships are put on hold, however, as the convoy reaches Charleston where they discover that the city is not at all what they had hoped for. Superficially it is a very well functioning city, but the members of the 2nd Mass soon discover that small comforts come at a hefty price. People are hiding, full of fear and even their leadership has become weak and ineffective for battle. Nothing is what it seems at first and realizing that the enemy is still out there the 2nd Mass decide to leave. None of the luxuries provided will ever give them peace unless the enemy is defeated first.

Truthfully? Tom's family sounds like mine. Torn apart by the devil and his schemes, my childhood sometimes resembles somewhat of an alien attack. I too, am dealing with the losses of my past, occasionally lashing out at my loved ones, but when we are travelling, our complicated relationships are put on hold. Just like in Fallling Skies we band together in search of other (childhood) survivors. On this healing journey of a life with God, I protect my children best I can, whilst trying to recruit my husband for the job of Captain Weaver. My teenage son, having reached puberty, certainly sometimes seems to need rescuing from alien control! We travel to places we have big hopes in and sometimes we get disappointed by what we find...small comforts come at a hefty price...

Like I said, I am currently traveling, in Europe, and sitting in a Catholic church service I cannot help but feeling that I have just arrived in Charleston. I mean no disrespect, for I am sure their intentions are good and their hearts often in the right place. But this is a place of total abundance and despite or maybe because of their comforts, they seem completely unaware of the enemy out there. Desperately wanting to feel safe, the people in the churches here are essentially just hiding. Never confronting the real issues of Christian living. Few are willing to face the enemy head on. But I am "2nd Mass" and I know I cannot stay here much longer. Upon arrival in Charleston the 2nd Mass temporarily had to lay down their weapons but they were not comfortable doing so. The bible says that word of God is our weapon. When I arrived here, I felt I was asked to lay it down too. They do not speak about God here. They might attend Sunday morning mass but they never talk about God during the week. Not with friends, not over coffee, not even in church choir practice. But they should. Rev 12:11 says "They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death." I am writing today to remind you that the battle is still on out there and God is with you so give Him glory! Acutely aware of the evil undercurrent in this world I choose to leave the "superficial safety" of this place and go back into battle. I am like Tom, in a battle accompanied by my children and I belong to the 2nd Mass and cannot stay in Charleston much longer. People "fall asleep" here in the abundance of little daily luxuries and they become weak and needy. In South Africa, I lead a little bible study for young children called JOT (Jesus our Teacher) and there we talk about our daily battles and how God helps us win them. This is my "local resistance movement", this is the place where I fight the enemy and try to lead young minds to victorious lives and I cannot wait to get back to my "army". My question to you - who are you? Neither is wrong, whether you choose to live in Charleston or move out with the 2nd Mass, but it is good to know where you will be fighting the battle...it is important to know where you belong.

Wishing you all a HAPPY and VICTORIOUS 2013!!!

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Leaving your castle...

Have you seen any Disney movies lately? They are wonderfully encouraging and have more to do with being a mom than you would think! I, personally, always like to look for the "hidden treasure", things I have in common with the heroine or hero...and this first one has a lot to do with my recent trip to Germany.

So, mom, allow yourself some time and go to the local video store. I suggest you start with one of my favorites - "Tangled". It features a Princess by the name of Rapunzel. Rapunzel lives in a very tidy but lonely castle and often wonders about the world outside her castle. She has a sense that life is passing her by and that the lights she can see once a year in the distance have something to do with her. Her supposed mother has actually captured her at an infant age and lied to her about her identity all of her life. Yet, somehow, deep inside of her, Rapunzel knows that she belongs elsewhere and that the answers she needs to find are "somewhere out there".

When her "Prince" arrives she is rather suspicious of his motives at first. She even ties him up and inspects him from every angle. Eventually though she decides, that he is the only one who can help her break away from her castle and find the answers she is looking for. She reluctantly leaves her castle with him by her side and embarks on a journey beyond her imagination. On this journey, she finds that the world is full of beautiful things and even the evil thugs she meets cannot withstand the charm of her childlike beauty. With her refreshing attitude she wins them over and they end up helping her on her quest to find the source of those beautiful lights. Though her journey is scattered with challenges, adventures and many exciting moments and though the evil stepmother is close on her heel, she remains unharmed. In the end she discovers her true identity, reunites with her family and even the sacrifice of her golden hair seems to pale in the face of her newly found joy.

Wow! Does this sound familiar or not? Have you ever had a sense that life is passing you by? Have you been hiding in a tidy or not so tidy home and wondered about the world out there? Have you had a sense that you are more precious than your life seems to reflect? And what about those lies that we keep hearing in our heads sometimes? Lies such as "you are not a good enough mother" or "you could do better if you were more like the other supermoms". We work, we clean, we cook, we drive, we do homework, play-dates, parties and more and yet somehow, deep inside, we know something is missing. Somehow, in all the busy rush of child rearing the fun has disappeared and with it, our true self. But here's the good news...you can find it again!

I have learnt that Jesus can be your Prince. If you are anything like Rapunzel (or me) then you might struggle with him at first too. I did. Though I did not smack him with a frying pan. But eventually I realized He is the only way to find answers to my questions. That's when I decided, reluctantly, to leave my castle and follow him on an adventure beyond my imagination. You can read the story of my personal adventure with Jesus by clicking on this link:

My German "kitchen battle"...

But wait! Before you do, please let me remind you that you too can decide to follow him and when you do, you are bound to encounter more joy and love than you imagined! I wish you a wonderful week!

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GERMANY...here it is!

Just like I promised...here it is - the incredible story of my journey to Germany where I took part in a cooking competition called "Küchenschlacht" and won! To read the full story just click on this link:

My German "kitchen battle"...

Enjoy reading it and have a fabulous day!


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